According to family systems theory, each member of a family is
linked to, or influences, the other members of the family.
Similarly, each relationship between two people that exists within
the larger family, has the potential to affect others within the
family system. Thus, when one or two people in a family experience
a major event, the other family members are inevitably going to be
affected in some way. Divorce is one such event that impacts the
entire family system, and the relationships that exist within the
family system. Although the divorce itself involves the dissolution
of the marital relationship between two parents, this event impacts
each family member individually - each member of the couple, and
any children. You learned about some of these individual impacts in
the lecture video and in your textbook reading. However, divorce
can also affect individual relationships within the family system:
the relationship between the parents, relationships between each
parent and each of their children, and even relationships between
siblings.
Imagine that you have a friend, Jenny, who has recently agreed,
along with her husband, Ben, to get divorced. There are 2 children
in this family: 8-year-old Sarah, and 5-year-old Davey. Jenny and
Ben are hoping to have joint custody over their children, where the
children will divide their time between the two parents as evenly
as possible. Your friend is concerned about how the divorce will
affect the family's ability to get along following the divorce -
and particularly how it will affect her children, one of whom is in
middle childhood, and the other in early childhood. Please answer
the following questions in at least 4-5 sentences. (Each
group member will be assigned a different relationship to focus
on: Sarah (daughter) + Davey (son))
First, tell your classmates which relationship you have been
assigned (Sarah (daughter) + Davey (son)). Then, describe what you
would tell Jenny about how the divorce may affect the relationship
between the two people you have been assigned (Jenny and Sarah,
Jenny and Davey, Sarah and Davey, Ben and Sarah, or Ben and Davey).
Make sure you consider whether age or gender might affect your
answer. Be sure to include information from the video lectures or
textbook to help support your answer.
What advice would you give to help your assigned relationship
remain harmonious and continue to thrive despite the transitions
associated with the divorce?