The New york Times https://nyti.ms/1uk7jVq SHORTCUTS No Need to Be Afraid. It's Only a Performance Review. By Alina Tugend Feb. 6, 2015 NANCY MORRIS has been on the giving and receiving end of bad feedback. Years ago, she was the administrative manager of a mental health unit that was the offshoot of a hospital. When she needed to bring up thorny subjects during performance reviews or at other times with employees, "I didn't make things clear," said Ms. Morris, now a specialist in business psychology in Ottawa. "I would be too diplomatic. Then I would get frustrated I wasn't being understood and I would be too harsh. I sort of missed the part in the middle." Later in her career, Ms. Morris was brought into a company as a senior administrator to make changes in the way a department operated. It involved streamlining systems, but not firing people. "My boss consistently said in our reviews that my work was great and that I was creating the change they had hired me to create," she said. "All of a sudden, one Monday morning, I was laid off." Almost everyone who has worked in an office has experienced - either as an employee or employer - a difficult conversation at work. It may involve telling a subordinate that he's taking too many unexplained absences or his work seems uninspired. Or perhaps asking a manager why she didn't give you a promotion or a coveted assignment. And now, when it's performance review season for many companies, knowing the art of delivering and receiving appropriate feedback is particularly important. Especially in these times of high job insecurity and streamlined workplaces, where there is less tolerance for employees who don't seem to be pulling their weight, employers need to be clear and accurate in their assessments. We're all told to be "honest but diplomatic," but translating that advice into a real dialogue takes training most of us never get. Often supervisors put off tricky talks because they "want to be kind, hope things will get better or pray the employee quits," said Steve Langerud, a workplace consultant. "The end result is usually the same," he said. Things get worse. "I have one client who, over many years, has been kind and avoided direct conversations about performance with employees," he added. "The result now it is hard to address issues that are impacting the organizations." Ms. Morris, for example, found out that other employees had been complaining about her because, she said, "my 'go get 'em' personality had apparently not gone over very well for some time. But my manager didn't know how to communicate with me that things weren't working. I would have sat and listened to feedback - I'm eager to get feedback, because it's the only way I can adjust my behavior." Feedback is the key here, and Sheila Heen, co-founder of Triad Consulting and co-author of "Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most" and "Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and